"EFFIGIES" excerpt 3

“Good evening, Mr. Pratt. I’m officer Darryl Knowles with the LaGrange Police Department and this is Corporal Wendell Geffen with the Illinois National Guard. As you have probably heard, Chicago and surrounding suburbs and communities are currently operating under the statute of martial law until further notice and we are under orders to monitor census and citizen compliance,” the cop advised, sneaking a look over Pratt’s shoulder and into his living room.

Knowles had the speech memorized after delivering it all day, 

“H-Hello. Ummm…we were just getting ready to sit down for some supper that my wife is busy fixing in the kitchen. What can I do for you men tonight?” Pratt asked with a certain degree of anxiety in his voice and a hint of irritation on his face.

Knowles and Geffen had that look of deception memorized too.

“According to our records, Mr. Pratt, there is a Mrs. Janet Pratt, a Jeffrey Pratt and a Lucy Pratt also residing at this address. If that is correct, I just need to confirm that they are in compliance with the new 6:00 PM home curfew law,” Knowles proceeded, again looking over the citizen’s shoulder and into his home.

Pratt noticed and was really looking edgy and nervous now and he kept his big frame in the doorway, blocking the entrance.

“A man and his family can’t even sit down to supper these days, without being interrupted? Whatever your business is, it can wait…you hear me, Officer Knowles?” the perturbed man to insist.

He began to flex and flaunt his intimidating size a bit. The cop was a good four inches shorter and probably fifty pounds lighter but did not look the slightest bit impressed or intimidated at all.

“It’s been a real long day, Pratt. Why don’t you just comply and give us a couple minutes of your time and we’ll be out of here fast. The Corporal and I just need to do a quick head count and then you can enjoy your dinner with the family. Just round up the wife and kids real quick and we’ll be on our way, okay?”

Geffen saw a young boy and girl that appeared to be about six or seven, peeking at the visitors from the hallway. Their father didn’t move a muscle. “My wife is in the shower right now. You can hear the water running, can’t you?” Pratt explained with furrowed brow, holding the door open a slight bit more for the men to listen, “I think you gentlemen should come at another time.”

Evidently, Janet Pratt was one talented woman -able to prepare dinner in the kitchen while also taking a shower in the bathroom. Knowles moved lightning quick, whipping out his handcuffs and locking Pratt’s right hand to the front door latch before he could react.  Meanwhile Geffen had reached behind over his shoulder and pulled out what appeared to be a three foot long piece of one inch pipe from some type of quiver attached to his back. The pipe had a large thick wire loop around one end and a much smaller loop at the other end. The Guardsman gave the metal tube a yank on the ends, expanding its length to almost double and quickly hooked a handle attachment in the small loop and threaded the handle into the end of the pipe with about three spins.

“Get out of my house, you motherfuckers! You’ve got no business invading a man’s privacy,” Pratt yelled, yanking hard at the doorknob as the two men drew their side arms and pushed past him into the living room, “You kids don’t tell them nothing , you hear me? Nothing!”

The children cowered and began to cry as the men walked past them.

The water in the bathroom was indeed running, evidently as a cover for the sounds that Mrs. Pratt was making further down the hall. Inspecting each room carefully, they found the monster that had been Janet Pratt in the master bedroom, chained at the wrists with what appeared to be a pair of dog leashes fastened to the thick oak posts of a king size bed. The men took note to watch out for dogs but had heard no barking or seen any other signs of canine presence.

The creature on the bed snapped viciously at both men, biting off a large piece of its own lower lip as Geffen slipped the large loop of wire from the pipe around its straining neck and tightened the noose with the handle at the other end.

“Okay Darryl…I got her,” the guardsman signaled to his partner and the cop began taking the leashes off her wrists.  

Mrs. Pratt tried to grab his gloved hands as soon as she got one of her own free, but Geffen was on the ball, using the pole to turn the zombie’s head so she could no longer see what Knowles was doing.

The men had become quite cohesive and methodical after a few twelve hour shifts of this.

“Free…she’s yours, Geff,” Knowles cautioned and he aimed his pistol at the creature’s head while Geffen got her off the bed and to her feet.

While being led down the hall, the growling dead woman passed by her children and tried to lunge at them. Geffen held fast, keeping her moving along with the rod and harness, staggering toward the front door. Framed family pictures were knocked off the walls and shattered on the floor and a coffee table lamp was batted onto the sofa by the zombie’s flailing hands, but no one was hurt.

Knowles restrained Pratt in a choke hold until Geffen passed through the doorway with his dead wife.

“You sons of bitches! You leave her be!” Pratt cursed from the front door as Geffen cautiously led the monster outside, “You’re scaring the hell out of my kids! Leave Janet be, and let her family take care of her.  We were just fine till you came along.”

There was never any reasoning with hostiles and neither Knowles nor Geffen made an attempt. People in denial like Pratt were operating on pure emotion, memory and perhaps more than a little insanity.

Once he had loaded up and secured Mrs. Pratt in the back of the big police van, Wendell placed a radio call to a counseling team that would immediately come out to visit the family. The counseling team would be larger than just Knowles and Geffen, determine the well-being of the children and if unless they found Pratt too unruly, probably unlock the man once he was sedated.

Knowles felt a gentle tug on hem of his police issue jacket and look down into the big, blue eyes of a tearful little Lucy Pratt with her twin brother trembling beside her.  These kids were about the same ages as his own daughters.

“M-Mister policeman…D-Daddy and Mommy were really, really, really…sniff… naughty…sniff…Daddy let Mommy eat my dog, Benny. Are you going to take them to jail now for eating my puppy?”

The kid looked pitifully sad and the cop wanted to say or do something for them but neither Geffen nor himself were trained or prepped to deal with the aftermath of census extraction. They were trained to get in…and get out.

“Uh…, something like that.  Sorry, honey,” Knowles smiled uneasily, “Some nice people are going to come help you and your brother real soon, okay?”

“He’s talking bullshit, kids. Tell her the way it really is, you jerks. They’re going to kill her, Lucy…kill your sick mommy just like they did to your friend Tammy’s dad. These assholes don’t understand…and they don’t care about her like we do. They won’t wait like us for doctors to make the medicine to keep Mommy from being sick. They’ll just fucking kill her,” Pratt yelled, yanking even harder on the doorknob.

They both had strict instruction not to engage hostiles but Geffen couldn’t stand it any longer. He walked right up and glared the red faced man handcuffed to the door.

“There is no cure for dead, Pratt. If you’re going to shoot your big mouth off to these poor little kids, why don’t you tell them the real truth, you son of a…”

“Geff!” Knowles cautioned, “Keep it zipped! The counseling team will be here in five minutes.”

The enraged man gave the doorknob one more powerful yank and it came off.

Pratt attacked immediately, grabbing Geffen around the neck with both hands and taking him down to the floor with his much superior body weight.

“I’ll kill you, you sonofabitch!” he spat as he strangled the National Guardsman in his vise-like grip. Or at least he tried to before being formally introduced to the sweet spot of Darryl Knowles’ nightstick.

It landed with a loud, dull thud against the back of Pratt’s skull.

The man’s eyes rolled up into the back of his head and he collapsed in a heap beside a coughing, gasping Wendell Geffen.

“Cough! Thanks, man,” he nodded and Knowles did the same.  

Once he regained his breath, his partner offered a hand up.

More officers from the combined Police/National Guard forces and a couple civilians appeared in the open doorway. The counseling team had arrived. A cop and the oldest member of the group looked at the unconscious man on the floor handcuffed to a doorknob and up at Knowles and Geffen.

 “Any problems, here gentlemen?”

“Just the usual. Take good care of those kids and keep a close eye on dad. He‘s a fighter,” Geffen replied.

Knowles just shook his head. “No, it’s wrapped and we’re good here, Sarge.”       

The old cop nodded, raising his eyebrows. He looked even more exhausted than they did.

“Good. Glad to hear that sometimes this shit duty goes right. Next up for you guys…4516 Caroll Avenue. Neighbors called in and said there are some of them stashed in the garage. We’ll be by once we clean things up here a bit.”

Geffen knew better but he still looked back at the crying children and a single tear dripped down his cheek and onto his uniform as he as he stepped over Pratt and passed through the family’s front door after his partner. It had indeed been a very long day.

****